Crisis mode

In the past few weeks, I've been struggling with career crisis No. 2. I think the first one struck sometime during the school year, about the time The Post did the story about quarter-life crises. This bout of occupation anxiety is more intense than that one because I'm much closer to actually having to figure out what I want to do. This would be easy if I was ready to be a traditional journalist - I'd apply for any open jobs that sounded remotely close to what I wanted to do, and then I'd take one, even if it was in some backcountry town at a paper with a circulation rivaling The Post's, and I'd be grateful for all the experience I'd be getting. However. Somewhere along the way I decided I wasn't all about newspapers like I thought I was. I think this was after my internship last summer, thus begging the question of why I took another newspaper internship this summer. And honestly, if I could answer that question, I would. I guess I kept hearing voices of mentors and employers of how great a DJ internship would look on my resume and what a great experience it would be. And it has been great. But how useful is a copy-editing internship (or two, for that matter) going to be to future employers if I decide to move outside journalism?
I'm trying not to have regrets - it's not like my future is set in stone here. I could go back to school for something else, do editing in a different venue, explore other communication-related opportunities (all options that I'm considering). But it's hard to be content to fly by the seat of your pants when, as it now stands, in a few short weeks you won't have health insurance anymore. Still, I'm trying not to freak out about all this. Things will fall into place sooner or later. Maybe I have to work a job I'm not crazy about or mooch off my parents longer than I wanted to. Because discovering what I truly want to do with my life is what's important to me, and if that means sacrifices or not really "using" the degree I got, then so be it. I can live with that.

On a less serious note, it's looking to be a good weekend. I actually have plans with people other than myself, and it should be fun. As much as I'm looking forward to coming home, I'm also aware that my time here is running out, and I'm doing my best to make the most of my California summer.
Speaking of, one of my coworkers asked me last night if I was going to save my license plates (I recently got the real California plates for my car). I said yes, not admitting that I'd already thought about what I wanted to do with them. He said he thought they'd be a good souvenir, and I agreed. I told him people back home think California is IT. So many people told me how lucky I was that I got to be out here, and while that's true, it's funny to think about. Because obviously Californians don't walk around every day thinking to themselves, "Man, I'm lucky to live here." Some days I do. But then again, I'm not a real Californian.